Countdown: T Day -7

Halp!

Send in da kitty kavalry, pleeze.

Me needz bakkup!

Animals Save the Planet

My friend, Sandrine, the mother of little baby Maya, sent me a link to a wonderful and witty website, sponsored by the cable network, Animal Planet.

It's a series of mini cartoons that show the importance of being green (as in environmentally conscious, not jealous) and helping to conserve our planet for Maya and future generations.

Claymation, adorable animals, funny cartoons, and saving the Earth! How can you go wrong?

Click here to view, or you can cut and paste the following link into your browser: http://www.animalssavetheplanet.com/media/swf/design_video.swf?vidNumber=1

My favorite is the prairie dogs video! Drop me a line & tell me which one you enjoyed the best.

Awareness is like Conditioner

I have light brown curly or wavy hair. Depending on the weather, I can look very different. I have my Kate Beckinsale days, and I can also have days when I look like Elmo’s brown cousin, Shmelmo. Since I was a child, I have always had knots in my baby fine hair, and combing it used to be an ordeal until the magnificent day I discovered, drum roll please…, Conditioner!
All of a sudden, tangles became a thing of the past, as I could now actually run my comb through my hair without cringing.
Now, I’m not sure exactly how it works: I just know it has something to do with the hair's cuticle and miraculous botanical extracts and formulas closely guarded by Mr. Garnier & Mr. Sassoon. But even though I don't know exactly how it all comes together, the conditioner still works to dissolve & untangle all the little knots on my head.

But what about the jumbles and messes inside the head, you know, under all the hair? Well, awareness, the non-judgmental and non-preferential seeing of something, is just like conditioner for those messes!

Simply seeing what is without judging it or wishing it were different, is enough to dissolve our mechanical behaviors, no matter how long they have been previously stuck. So we have the choice to simply look at a behavior and say “oh. I did that” without tacking on the rest of the sentence which is usually, “I’m so _________.” (Which, let's admit, we usually fill in with an unflattering word, like ‘stupid’, ‘dumb’, ‘pathetic’, ‘lazy’ … And if you notice that you tacked something on, then just don’t continue the cycle. Just like you don’t have to read or forward a chain email telling you Bill Gates is going to give you a penny for every fwd you send, you can just hit ‘delete’ instead and get rid of the Spam in your thoughts. You can even make a game of it.

No Assembly Required

You know that feeling you got as a kid, opening up your presents on Christmas morning or on your Birthday, and you ripped open the wrapping paper, and -oh my golly- there it was: the Snoopy Sno Cone Machine / Model Train set / Barbie's Dream House, in all its put-together glory in the big glossy photo on the side of the box. At the bottom, there they were, those three dreaded words sure to strike dread in the heart of any parent: "some assembly required." But in your sugar-induced euphoria, you gleefully ripped open the box, and out tumbled dozens of plastic pieces and tiny screws & bolts. And then watched in a fit of frustrated agony as it took your Mom or Dad and 2 uncles (one of whom was an engineering major in college) about four hours to put together. And then it still looked nothing like what was on the box? Remember that?
Well Transformation is nothing like that! In fact, there's no assembly required. Transformation can start right away! You don't need to wait till you are "better" or "all put-together." Where and as you are right now is not only enough, it is perfect.
All it takes to transform is the non-jugdgmental and non-preferential seeing of what is. The way your life is right now - across the board - including your job (or lack thereof), your relationship (or lack thereof), family, education, physcal condition, home, commute, internet connection (or lack thereof), wardrobe is perfect for you to experience Transformation.
That is something I had forgotten lately, and luckily was reminded by some pretty cool people I am proud to call my friends.

Save an Italian Wildlife Oasis

My lovely friend, Nicki, has posted an important anouncement on her delightful blog, The Life I Chose. She has alerted all those who love Positano and all those who want to help save rare and endagered wildlife (that should cover everyone on the planet...) to the threat to the magical wildlife preserve, Il Vallone Porto, located just outside Positano, Italy

Please sign the online petition to save the valley, http://www.firmiamo.it/positanovalloneporto.

Nicki writes:

This wonderful wild canyon is about to be destroyed. Somebody has decided that there could be a risk of flash floods in the valley and a proposal has been accepted to build a 24 metre long concrete dam through the valley, tearing down all the trees, woodland, plantlife and ancient pathways, and destroying many species of rare ferns, flora and creatures.This valley is under enviromental protection and it has already been scientifically proved that going ahead with these works would worsen the situation.A petition has been launched to try and stop these people from destroying one of the most beautiful natural areas left in Positano. Gianni has translated it into English and tonight we have corrected it and typed it up. I am posting it here below and I beg all of you, especially anybody who has ever been to Positano or cares about wildlife, natural beauty, rare little animals or magical woodland streams to please click on the link and sign the online petition to help us save the valley.

Please SIGN THE ONLINE PETITION!!

Life is a Reflection of You

Lately, I've been clearing up everything around me because, quite frankly, Life has been getting pretty messy around me. So I cleaned up my apartment and went through my closet and tidied up my desk at work. I also found time to clear out old emails and empty my spamboxes.

While doing so, I found this story in an email from my dear friend, Jorge. I don't know where it's from, so I am unable to credit it, but I really loved it because it helps me shatter certain excuses or illusions that I can hide behind when I am lazy. Some examples of these excuses are: "I have too much work", "It's not my fault", or "Yes, but it's because of________________."

Now you can fill in the blank with gravity, the greenhouse effect, shifting economic climates in developing countries, the low dollar exchange rate, my shoulder pain, lack of sleep. Either way, if I'm willing to tell the truth, it's all hooey. Plus, it begs the question of our really being the authors of our own lives. In reality, we actually have the Life we have created for ourselves.
Personal Responsibility... 1, Hapless Victim Theory... 0.

A son and his father were walking in the mountains.Suddenly, his son falls, hurts himself and screams: "AAAhhhhhhhhhhh!!!" To his surprise, he hears the voice repeating, somewhere in the mountain:"AAAhhhhhhhhhhh!!!"Curious, he yells: "Who are you?" He receives the answer: "Who are you?"Angered at the response, he screams: "Coward!"He receives the answer: "Coward!"He looks to his father and asks: "What's going on?"

The father smiles and says: "My son, pay attention." And then he screams to the mountain: "I admire you!" The voice answers: "I admire you!"Again the man screams: "You are a champion!" The voice answers: "You are a champion!"

The boy is surprised, but does not understand. Then the father explains: "People call this ECHO, but really this is LIFE. It gives you back everything you say or do. Our life is simply a reflection of our actions. If you want more love in the world, create more love in your heart. If you want more competence in your team, improve your competence. This relationship applies to everything, in all aspects of life; Life will give you back everything you have given to it."

Your Life is not a Coincidence. It's a Reflection of You!

Are We There Yet?

It's funny how pervasive a certain pattern of thought can be if left unexamined.
When I am not practicing awareness, I can quickly fall into a pattern of thinking that this moment isn't it, and instead wait for some future, shinier, better moment to come along.

But have you ever been stuck in traffic and really wanted to trade places with the silver car 4 cars ahead of you in the right lane? If only I could be where that car is, I could relax. What happens when you get there? Don't you just pick out another car that seems to be much further along than you are now? Or, have you ever greeted a friend's promotion or raise with the thought that all your worries would disappear if only your own boss would be equally magnanimous and insightful as to recognize your true worth? Has a cousin's engagement ever made you long for the day you could escape relationship limbo & enter the promised land of the affianced?

Well, living one's life as a constant race to get to what's around the next corner, or anywhere other than exactly whee you are in this moment, is a bit like driving around with a backseat squirming with 5 year-olds enagaged in a full-on concert performance of "Are we there yet? Are We there yet? Are we there yet?" ect... etc... It sure doesn't make for a very pleasant ride...
At best, it can leave you with a splitting headache. It can also make you miss a turn-off, or in other words, distract you from the true path you should be following.
But a distraction like that can cause fender benders - little bumps on your journey that will cause a ripple effect of debris that will need to be sorted out, taking more time and energy away from the things you are passionate about.

So answer that impatient chatter thus: Yup. We're there. We have arrived. We're here. We are right where we are supposed to be. The moment is perfect. So enjoy the scenery!

Quotes from Fr. Anthony de Mello

While checking out an interesting website called Soul Surgery (see previous post,) I came across this very insightful author, Fr. Anthony de Mello. The creator of of the blog, Carol L. Skolnick, reprinted some quotations from De Mello in her post. I thought they were so right on and consistent with living with well-being that I wanted to share some of them as well.

"It is a great mystery that though the human heart longs for Truth, in which alone it finds liberation and delight, the first reaction of human beings to Truth is one of hostility and fear!"

"There is only one cause of unhappiness: the false beliefs you have in your head, beliefs so widespread, so commonly held, that it never occurs to you to question them."

"As you identify less and less with the 'me.' you will be more at ease with everybody and with everything. Do you know why? Because you are no longer afraid of being hurt or not liked. You no longer desire to impress anyone. Can you imagine the relief when you don't have to impress anybody anymore? Oh, what a relief. Happiness at last!"

"Wisdom tends to grow in proportion to one's awareness of one's ignorance."

"Suffering points out that there is falsehood somewhere. Suffering occurs when you clash with reality. When your illusions clash with reality when your falsehoods clash with the truth, then you have suffering. Otherwise there is no suffering."

- Fr. Anthony de Mello

...And Elephants

I have always loved Elephants because I find them to be mystical creatures. They strike me as wise and connected to the Earth, their environment, and their ancestors.
That's what intitially attracted me to this interesting post on a blog called Soul Surgery by Carol L. Skolnick.

The Post is called Taming and Befriending the Elephant, and I thought this post, was very keen because it adressed our reluctance to deal with issues that we anticipate and fear will be painful or shameful to confront. The irony is that it is this fear itself that causes all the suffering, not the actual issue itself.
I can relate this to the first and third principles of Instantaneous Transformation. The first principle states that "What you resist, persists, grows stronger and dominates your life." Just like the fear of whatever we are resisting facing. The third principle shows us how to break free because "what you allow to be exactly as it is, without judging it, will complete itself." For more information on the principles of Instantaneous Transformation, check out the links on the right.

Taming and Befriending the Elephant
You've heard the expression, "There's an elephant in the living room"? That purported pachyderm represents something huge that everyone knows about, yet no one wants to call attention to, for fear of setting off a stampede.

Most of us learn to pretend there's no elephant when we're very small. Maybe one parent is alcoholic, or having an affair. Big sister throws up after dinner, little brother seems blue lately, but "it's just a phase kids go through." We don't talk about these things, especially outside the family; we fear we could rock the boat, and lose our "happy" home.

Later in life, there may be other issues we're reluctant to acknowledge. If we're trying to keep status quo, we can end up not simply with an elephant in the room, but with bats in the belfry.

"This marriage isn't working, but we have to stay together for the kids, and pretend everything is okay for their sake."

"I'm sure everyone is aware there's something amiss at the office, but I'm not going to be the whistle blower; we all need our paychecks."

"Yeah, I did notice the bruises. She said she fell downstairs. Well, of course she seemed shaken, wouldn't you?"

Why do we pretend something is okay when it isn't—or, in extreme cases, that it doesn't even exist? Some possibilities:

1. Shame. What a terrible thing for the elephant to be here!
2. We believe so strongly that the "elephant" shouldn't be there that we can't even recognize it as an elephant.
3. If we see something as a problem it means we're "negative" or "unevolved."
4. We believe that if we told the truth, we could hurt someone.
5. Acknowledging a problem might cost us something (money, a relationship, reputation, peace in the house).
6. Maybe if we wait long enough, the problem will go away by itself.

Meanwhile the elephant is taking up a great deal of space. It trumpets loudly, it eats a lot, it's creating a mess, and there's always the possibility that it could get loose, run rampant, and stomp or smother us to death. This elephant feeds, not on peanuts, but on fear. Eventually, it may grow so large that we can no longer pretend it's not in the way.

That's a good thing...because the best way to handle an elephant in the living room is not by ignoring it. If it won't leave by itself (and trust me, it won't as long as there's something for it to feed upon), it's far more effective to recognize the elephant as an elephant and proceed from there.

The elephant is no larger, wilder, or all-consuming than our thoughts about it.

©2008 by Carol L. Skolnick; all rights reserved.

Fun Finder Event List Launched

I finally launched my new event email list.
If you live in the NY area and want to join us for diverse & dynamic events, sign up for Fun Finder and get fun delivered right to your inbox.

Way to Unreasonable Happiness

Dan Millman's book, The Way of the Peaceful Warrior, is an amazing journey of self-discovery and enlightenment. It was a very fluid read and an eye-opening experience. The author unveils that the way to Happiness is by being present along the journey. Every step of the journey is important. There are no ordinary moments. There is in actuality no hierarchy, just the illusion based on our preference. So our college graduation is not intrinsically better than the last day of vacation or garbage recycling day or even this very moment. It all matters, because "the Essence of Aliveness matters; the details do not." Beneath all circumstances, thoughts & emotions lies "the innate perfection of one's life unfolding. That is the secret of unreasonable happiness."

Another book I love that delves into the magic available in each moment as it unfolds is Being Here: Modern Day Tales of Enlightenment. Authors Ariel and Shaya Kane explain that if you trade in your preferences for the willingness to be in each moment as it actually is, you will be rewarded with extraordinary well-being. Since reading these works I have had many examples of "unreasonable happiness" in my own life. A recent 6+ hour wait in an airport in Costa Rica, which ended with a cancelled flight and an unexpected overnight stay, became a delightful adventure and an opportunity to set aside my preferences and have well-being. One had only to look at the faces of other passengers to see that this was not the common response to the situation. But as I have begun to engage in each moment, without prejudice, my life has opened up to unexpected sources of actual joy & well-being.

Thing a Week

My friend, Stephen, showed me this totally adorable video based upon a song composed & recorded by a wonderful artist, Jonathan Coulton. For those of you who have never heard of him, Coulton made himself a promise to compose & record one song a week for a year and post each one on his website, and he has been at it for many, many weeks. He calls it “Thing a Week.” I very much admire him because he is really going for his life with gusto and consistency. Coulton is also a very talented musician.

A catchy, cool song of his, Code Monkey, started a trend on Youtube about a year ago and is still going strong. Coulton first recorded the funny and touching song about a programmer in a nameless corporation and posted it on his website. Then an IT expert who works for Adobe made an animated video for the song, using images from videogames & put it on Youtube.
It started to draw a crowd, and this girl, Emily, found the song & made a pajama video of it (a pajama video is when someone dances around his/her bedroom in jammies lip-synching/dancing/interpreting a song in front of a webcam.)
Then Coulton gave a concert and found out Emily was in the audience by coi-incidence. He invited her on stage to re-enact her video as he played Code MOnkey. Anotherfan at the concert, filmed this and posted it on Youtube.

Now, I know there is a lot of pooh on the Internet in general, and Youtube in particular, but this is worth checking out.

Check it out in this order:

Original song + video made by “Spiffworld,” a fan who works at Adobe and spent lots of time animating a cool video for the song.

thh Emily’s pajama video of Code Monkey.

Emily performing her dance live at a Jonathan Coulton Concert in Chicago on December 8th.


I highly recommend that you check out Coulton’s website to hear more great tunes, like Tom Cruise Crazy, You ruined Everything, to hear more great music by Coulton.

Jonathan Coulton had a dream to make music & share it with people. He did not wait until his life circumstances showed up as "perfect." Instead he made a commitment to himself & his desire to create and he kept it. That's Transformation. He made no excuses. And he did it all while being a new Dad! Now I'm sure Coulton had lots of legitimate reasons to skip a week or two, but he chose not to take them and he kept his word.
And along the way, he created something wonderful and has become an inspiration for so many others. That's Transformation too.

Evolution of Dance

Behold, the Evolution of Dance...
What is most wonderful about this clip is how comedian Judson Laipply slides naturally from one dance into the next. He starts off with Elvis Presley and progresses all the way to NSYNC, hitting many musical milestones along the way. It's a very organic journey past Chuck Berry, Michael Jackson's Thriller, the Bangles' Walk Like an Egyptian, Mc Hammer, the Running Man, the Macarena and other favorites.

Santa Chronicles

Merry Merry Christmas!

Do you find it difficult to shop for presents for your loved ones? Stuck on what to get your colleagues or friends? Well imagine Santa's task! Santa deserves major points! Ever wonder what he's up to this time of year?

I invite you to check out a wonderful blog. It's called the Santa Claus Blog, and it is written by Santa. Yes, that guy. I had no idea how taxing his job is and all the different legal hurdles he has to go through to deliver his presents.

I love this blog, and I will be checking in all through the year.

The best gift for yourself: realizing you can't do it wrong!

I wanted to share a great email I received from my friend, Marie Forleo, of "The Good Life." Marie is a Life Coach, a Nike athlete, and a top level Crunch fitness trainer. She is also the author of a terrific book called How to Make Every Man Want You. An audio version will be available soon.

Marie wrote:

I've been speaking with my VIP Private clients and noticed a common set of themes arising. And when more than one person is feeling something, it's usually a cultural current. One of things that people are reporting is a mild sense of sadness. Nothing major or devastating, just a dash of melancholy during what's supposed to be one of the happiest times of the year. So if find yourself feeling a little blue, rest assured you're not alone.
During the Holiday season, we often find ourselves feeling unusually pressured to "do it right." Whether that means buying the "perfect" presents, going to the "best" parties, or having the "right" things to say, many of us are left feeling like we're not measuring up. Add to that the picture perfect images of couples and families you see on TV and it's not surprising we feel like we're coming up a bit short.
(Can you relate?)
Well I've got a suggestion. I think it's time to give ourselves a break, have a good laugh and recognize we can't do it WRONG.
Really.
It's an impossibility for you to do the Holidays wrong. Whether you're having a quiet time at home, a fiesta with friends, or an adventure with your crazy-yet-nevertheless-entertaining family, it will all turn out exactly as it should.
The only question is whether or not you'll give yourself license to relax and enjoy the ride.
Remember, you can only be exactly as you are in each moment. That means you're a perfect you. (Yes YOU!) So accept this as your official "permission slip" to take a deep breath and relax into the rest of your Holiday. Trust that the plans you've made (or not made) and the presents you've bought (or not bought) are wonderfully and deliciously perfect.
If you find your mind racing, slow down and melt into the moment. Be wherever you are. Listen to the people you're with. Enjoy whatever unfolds - even if it's different that what you expect.
I wish you a blessed Holiday season and send a ton of love to you and yours,
xox
Marie

If you would like a copy of Marie's book, you can download the digital version here that comes with a bonus video, transcript and additional ebook!http://www.makeeverymanwantyou.com/

ROFL Cat

A humor break is a wonderful tool to get back into the flow.

If you like cute kittens, check out the rofl cat website here.
If you don't, what the heck is wrong with you? LOL

Enjoy!

Men, Money & Chocolate

A very dear English friend of mine, Menna van Praag, has published a lovely and whimsical book that inspires and delights.

Men, Money & Chocolate is a fable that tells the story of Maya, a young girl who is inspired to go for her life with excellence after an encounter with a mysterious stranger.

Menna explains in her own words,

A little while ago I had an experience that flipped me into three days of enlightenment. Everything became clear. For the first time I could really see people, and knew what they were thinking. Most importantly of all, I could see what stopped them being truly happy.
On the third day I heard three words: Men, Money and Chocolate. It was the pursuit of love, security and pleasure that so often caused people to lose themselves and their chance of experiencing joy.
That day I started to write a book about my experience. Men, Money & Chocolate tells the story of a woman who learns the secrets to enlightenment and discovers how to get what she really wants without losing herself in the process.

You can read more about the book, as well as preview the first chapter on the official website here.

To purchase Men, Money & Chocolate, click here.

The Four Agreements

Having read and adored The Mastery of Love by Don Miguel Ruiz, I was very excited to read The Four Agreements. Ruiz is a Nagual (master) in the Toltec tradition. The Toltec were scientists and artists from Southern Mexico who formed a society to conserve and expand upon the spiritual knowledge and practices of their ancestors. Less of a religion than a way of life, the Toltec saw the sacred in the ordinary, much like followers of Taoism. As Ruiz explains, "Toltec considered science and spirit to be the same since all energy, whether material or ethereal, is derived from the same source and governed by the same universal laws."

In his book, Ruiz shares four agreements, or simple guiding principles, that can free us to live with well-being and true happiness.

1. Be Impeccable With Your Word
2. Don't Take Anything Personally
3. Don't Make Assumptions
4. Always Do Your Best

In order to discover Heaven on earth, the author explains that we need only keep our word with ourselves and live with integrity. This will support our living in the present moment. By telling the truth and being with life as it actually unfolds, rather than disagreeing and investing pointlessly in how we would prefer it to be, we can be in harmony with our lives. You can learn more about this wonderful book on Ruiz' website here.

What I appreciated most about The Four Agreements is that its advice is so practical and achievable, even in a challenging environment such as New York City. Another book with practical wisdom that can put you in touch with the magic available in the present moment is Being Here: Modern Day Tales of Enlightenment, by Ariel & Shya Kane. Both Ruiz's and the Kanes' books have touched my life by supporting me in being the author of my life, and I recommend them wholeheartedly.

To purchase The Four Agreements, click Here.
To purchase Being Here, click here.

Musical Connections

I was going through my friend, Terri's blog, and found something neat. Her blog (all about jazz and jazz viewing opportunities in NYC) also mentions Transformation. Now Terri is a lovely woman, very kind & self-effacing. But I can't say I knew much about her, other than that I liked her & that she had traveled to Italy recently. Reading her blog, however, I got to meet her in a whole new way. And I am bowled over by her passion for music!

Also, since she is traditionally quiet during our Monday Night Alive discussions, I never knew what impact they had on her life, but I have always been happy to see her friendly smile amid the company of our friends. It was so cool to read about her experience of Transformation in her own words. I recommend Terri's blog in general for anyone interested in the NY music scene. And check out this post to read someone else's perspective on Transformation and self-discovery.

Happy Thanksgiving

For a few Thanksgiving chuckles, check out this very funny video on UTube. It is of a turkey singing a parody of Gloria Gaynor's disco hit, "I will survive." It is quite hysterical and a real crowd pleaser.

I'm very excited to celebrate Thanksgiving at my Mom's house. We will be celebrating with my Aunt Joanna & my cousin Giorgia, who drove up from Maryland. My cousin, Gayleen, her husband, Skippy & their son, Dakota also joined us.

My Mom & Aunt took over the kitchen & sent Giorgia & me out for a walk. I am doubly blessed because one of my favorite family memebers is also one of my dearest friends. Pretty convenient, because it makes family reunion time very warm & fuzzy. I admire Giorgia because she is always true to herself & has her attention on others rather than herself. She is a generous listener and genuinely invests herself in making the world a better place. We had such a wonderful walk & talked about so many things. We discovered a beautiful tree in the neighborhood. The leaves looked on fire and capped a strangely braided trunk.



By the time we got back from our walk, it was tme to set the table and make the salad and other last minute details before the rest of the family arrived. We did not overeat, but enjoyed small portions of varied grub. After dinner, we had a family game of Scrabble. Here is a picture of a portion of our large dinner table.

So what are you grateful for this year? Big or small, what about your life in this moment do you want to celebrate? Is it your health? A loving relationship? Your job? Family? Wonderful friends? Do you have a great vacation planned? Did a child trust you with a secret? Does your favorite pair of pants fit again?

I'm grateful for my supportive family & amazing friends. I'm so happy for the guidance of my life coaches, Ariel & Shya Kane, and the entire Transformational community. My life is very wonderful and it's nice to take a moment and give thanks for that.